City Mouse Country Mouse

During Holy Week, many people take the opportunity to return to their families in the provinces on the long weekend. It gets really nice and quiet in the city as a result.

When trying to come up with something to write, I made the terrible mistake of browsing Facebook for ideas. There was a minor fuss about some Facebook posts by city slickers sarcastically quipping about how the "main characters" have all gone home to the provinces. Honestly, I didn't and still don't know what this meant exactly. I could only guess that people in the city don't like people from the province? If that's the case, I'm sure the feeling is mutual.

Sometimes I think that most of my negative opinions and beliefs about the Filipino character come from the fact that I live in a city. To live in the city is to be surrounded by strangers. That's when you really learn what "low-trust society" means. You can't trust anyone around here. But could things be different in some stereotypical "barrio" in the hills where everyone knows everyone? 

I can't help but notice this tendency, which I am also guilty of, to inflate the goings on in the city with the general condition of the rest of the province. It's even worse for a metropolis like Manila where happenings there are taken as the concern of the whole country. 

I can think of two reasons why cities are prioritized by the government and by the media. The first reason is that democracy is essentially a numbers game. Naturally, the place with more people gets more attention. The issues of the city seem more important since the voice of the people is just louder. 

The second reason is that cities are more developed in terms of infrastructure. It's easier for the government and mass media to operate in a place with transportation and communication networks. The provinces and far-flung places meanwhile, are notoriously neglected. Are they neglected because they are undeveloped or undeveloped because they are neglected? Regardless, the government can easily operate in the city and since politicians don't like to work too hard, they concentrate their efforts here. This also relates neatly to the first reason, that is, that there's more voters in the city.

Is the enmity between city folk and provincial folk real? I think it exists to some degree - the term "imperial Manila" didn't arise from nowhere. It's not as serious as outright hatred, though. It's more about the fact that you need to go to the city to avail of services or to find a high paying job. In my opinion, city folk have no right to complain about provincial folk coming in to inconvenience them with their presence. I'm willing to bet money that, if given the choice, people would rather not go to some hellhole like Manila to process their papers or whatever if the same could be done in their hometown. It's just another consequence of poor development and government neglect. The people have no choice. 

The "city versus province" paradigm is just another fact of life. 

Extreme Rules Deluxe Community Quarantine-pounder with Cheese

Last Tuesday, Enhanced Community Quarantine (ECQ) standards were reinstated in Cebu City given the non-stop increase of Wuhan virus cases. The government was nice enough to announce this during midnight just on the day it was to take effect for maximum disruption. Sometimes it seems the government is having way too much fun with the extraordinary powers it now has over our lives.

Non-Filipino readers may wonder what "ECQ" is. During the outbreak of the virus, the government came up with several grades of quarantine standards. The strictest is Extensive/Extreme Community Quarantine or EECQ. ECQ is a step below that but don't confuse it with Modified Enhanced Community Quarantine (MECQ), which is not as strict as ECQ but is still stricter than Modified General Community Quarantine (MGCQ). General Community Quarantine (GCQ) is considered the least strict of all. Of course, this all shouldn't be confused with a "lockdown" which is a different thing altogether. You got all that?

What's the real difference between all these forms of quarantine? Hell if I know the specifics. Go look up an infographic on google or something. Best start learning how to use the internet. All these different quarantines makes Bush-era America's color coded "terror level" look genius. Why couldn't we have added some colors to the mix? That would have been nice.

Why is the outbreak so bad here? Everyone has their own theory - people being "stubborn" is the favorite. It's only human to play the blame game. But I do wonder why Cebu is getting the harsh treatment while Manila, a city much more dense in population, gets bumped down to GCQ. 

Whatever the reason, it's just more shit to deal with.

Esprit de Coop

No matter how much of a shut-in a person is, he will eventually get sick of confinement. However, this lock-down from the Wuhan virus shows no sign of ending. 

The situation is untenable, let's be honest. People can't stay cooped up in their homes indefinitely. People have their livelihoods to worry about. The government doesn't have infinite resources despite what too many people believe. 

Naturally, upset people will want the lock-down restrictions eased. Despite this understandable sentiment, it is remarkable to me that such talk is met with derision by the public and the many scolds of the internet. Of course, the quarantine cannot be lifted completely. No sane person would take such an extreme position. But it seems wanting things to go back to normal, even gradually, has become taboo, a sign of selfishness and a desire to see dead people litter the streets. 

Whether or not it's "right" to ease restrictions is of no importance to me. This situation cannot last forever and will end eventually. What matters to me is effect all of this has on people's morale and mindsets. In times of disaster, morale is something that should never be ignored. It is very important that we remain calm and don't lost our heads. Panic won't help anyone. 

The way I see it, the problem is a lack of inspiring leadership, which allows uncertainty and hence, fear to spread. So far, all we've had is negative talk. Think of it as being an employee in a failing company. Fist you hear disturbing rumors that the company isn't doing so well. Then you hear rumors of layoffs. Then people are getting shuffled around, etc. You'd see the writing on the wall start thinking about jumping ship. Savvy people would.

In the case of the quarantine, however, there is no jumping ship. Everyday is an endless barrage of bad news. Every time you turn on the TV or radio, there's a new plan to impose even more restrictions on the populace. There's more scolding from the vinegar drinkers about how the people are so stupid and stubborn. Worse, you get reckless talk about having the police arrest people on the spot or how we need "martial law" like conditions. It's demoralizing. What are we supposed to think?

I think there's too much eagerness to throw bile at those who dare to be optimistic. People are afraid, that's all. They want to hear that there's an actual plan to bring things back to normal. So far, all we're getting from the powers that be are blame and threats. For all his inexplicable appeal to the masses, Duterte's overbearing style is not doing him any favors this time.

As an opposite example, over in America, Trump is criticized for wanting to reopen the states and lift their quarantines. I don't care if people hate Trump but they ought to have caught on to his style by now. The point isn't that he's going to do it. The point is to put the issue on the table. It's a negotiator's trick: stake out the most extreme position with the mind to gradually pull to a more moderate one when the other party complains. His opponents would be foolish to let him monopolize positivity.

Over here, it seems like a never-ending downward spiral.

Dragnet

It is much easier to measure efficiency in a factory than a bureaucracy. In a factory, it's a matter of input versus output; how much can be produced from how much material. In a government bureaucracy, it's not as straightforward. 

There is the tendency to rely on numbers to gauge  how effective something is. It's only natural. People like big numbers and charts with arrows pointing up. It works for private businesses for the simple reason that profit is easy to measure. It's different in government since nothing is constant and predictable.

It's better to give an example. In the courts, efficiency is measured in the number of cases disposed of per month. It makes sense. However, it does not take into account that it's not really up to the courts to decide how many cases get resolved in a month. Maybe the trial gets postponed. Maybe the parties decide to compromise. Maybe the compromise doesn't push through. The best you can do is make an estimate. This system isn't necessarily bad. One side effect though, is that some courts tend to hold off on promulgating decisions if the month has a sufficient amount in order to load it onto the next month's numbers. It produces minor delay but it shows that such a system can be gamed to make the reports look good.

The worst example of over-reliance on raw numbers is the travesty that is the "quota system" of the police. The police are given "quotas" by their superiors on how many arrests they should make per month. Right off the bat, one can see the problem with this system. How can you make a quota of how many arrests ought to be made per month? What is this based on? Are they implying they know with certainty how many crimes are committed in a given time and in a given area? Suppose that there's a lull in criminal activity, what then?

The problem with this quota system is that it encourages the police to arrest as many people as they can whenever they conduct a raid on a drug/gambling den. They call these raids "one time, big time" operations. I don't know why they call it "one time" as they do it many times but they're not kidding about the "big time" part. A lot of people get caught in these raids and a disturbing number of them are simply bystanders. It's like fishermen with a trawl net catching everything they can leaving destruction in their wake. The quota has to be met. Of course, the number of actual convictions isn't used as a measure of effectiveness, no, that's the prosecutor's problem. The police don't care. You could be dragged off to jail just by being at the wrong place at the wrong time.

In their haste to arrest as many people as they can, the police also tend to make a lot of mistakes. Evidence is often lacking. Suspects have to wait in the filthy and overcrowded jails before their case gets called to trial. When the time comes to explain the arrest, the judge is going to know eventually when a suspect is a mere bystander who was just out to buy a pack of sugar. Outside of raids, you have people arrested without a proper warrant just by looking sufficiently suspicious. The irony is that nothing can kill a case faster than a wrongful arrest. In which instance, it is just a massive waste of time for everyone involved.

But we need to get those numbers up, don't we? How else would the brass know if these deadbeat cops are earning their pay?

There has to be a better way.

The Ingrown

A pain on my right big toe had been nagging at me for months. Like many bad things in life, pretending it doesn't exist won't make it go away. Eventually the side of my toe had deformed to such an extent that I developed a blister since my flesh was rubbing against my shoe. There was a shooting pain from the tip of my toe to the base.

I decided to see a doctor. Based on the pictures I sent him beforehand, he told me that it looked like a severe case of an ingrown toenail and that surgery would be best. I wished it was a wart instead or something minor. I suggested he examine in it person first before recommending action. He scheduled an examination inside the minor operating room of the hospital. I guess he was that sure of the diagnosis.

On the day of the appointment, he barely had to look at it for five seconds before concluding that it was an ingrown toenail. I had two choices: surgery or antibiotics. I asked the doctor what good antibiotics would do since it won't exactly solve the problem. He shrugged. I love non-options. The illusion of choice can be very comforting. Surgery it was.

I had to put a gown over my clothes and a shower-cap. Since the nurses manning the operating room had nothing better to do, they began to crowd around. I told the doctor to keep the helping hands to a minimum. I'm no lab rat.

I lay down on the hospital bed and had them put the tray in such a manner as to block my view of my foot. I don't think I can stand seeing my flesh opened even if there was anesthetic. Speaking of which, the application of anesthesia was the only painful part. They brought out a cartoonishly large syringe with a long needle to match. He stuck it in a place I won't mention. It stung like hell. After a while, I couldn't feel a thing, at least, until he began to work. I felt him poking and prodding so I said, "Doc, it's not enough!" So he decided to stick the needle in and inject a little more anesthetic. For God's sake.

It went by quickly, I was unusually chatty. I tend to get chatty when I'm under the knife. I remember being operated on years before. I was a blabbermouth in the operating room. I bet they were relieved when the knock-out gas kicked in.

You have to cut all the way to the nail bed in surgery for an ingrown toenail. After he tugged on some things, he showed me the bit that was digging into my flesh. It looked like a shard of glass. 

So he wrapped it up, I paid the fees and bought the medicines and that was it. The toe needed to be wrapped up when I take a bath so the doctor recommended that I buy condoms to wrap my toe in. I felt the need to inform the pharmacist that I needed the condom for my feet. I'm not sure what she made of that.

I'm just going to let my toenails grow out from now on.

Counterflow Culture

If you read the newspapers or listen to the radio, you'd learn that the most pressing and most indisputably important issue facing the city of Cebu today is the problem of "counterflowing" drivers. The mayor recently passed an ordinance imposing stricter penalties on drivers caught in the act, including impounding their vehicle for thirty days.

Despite living in a modern city, it is tiring sometimes how public discourse meanders from one minor-but-suddenly-important topic to the next. It's all so very provincial. I digress. 

I've written many times in the past about how government tends to act in an overly oppressive manner whenever it feels the need to look busy. Not so long ago, there was a ban on tall buildings due to the sudden realization that fire exists. Recently, misbehaving youth had the city mull over imposing a  curfew to prevent kids from being recruited by gangs or something, as if they couldn't just recruit at daytime. A few days ago, the intellectuals in government grew eyes and noticed that there was a lot of graffiti on the walls so they started barking about passing measures to regulate the sale of spray-paint. You get the drift.

I admit that I'm being too unfair to the government; the people share a lot of the blame as well. Using the current hubbub about counterflowing drivers as an example, I submit that the people's general lack of discipline and cavalier attitude to law and order is what invites the heavy-handed attitude the government has. It's a chicken or egg thing but they both feed each other.

The price that must be paid to live in an ordered society is the surrender of some of our freedoms. We surrender some of our personal autonomy and agree to live by certain rules in order that our own rights are protected. A lawless state is a horror to behold. I know because I need only open a window. 

The more people act selfishly and ignore the law to the prejudice of others, the more the people clamor for government to step in and knock some heads around. The current measure against counterflowing drivers is quite popular but I don't see this as a good sign. What it means to me is that the higher our desire for order, the more willing we are to accept the government adopting increasingly brutal measures to do so.

It begs the question, "why can't people just obey the law"? That's a question with a thousand unsatisfying answers but the only one worth asking. If people were angels we wouldn't need laws. It's tragic really, how man provides the means of his own undoing. Tyranny is our ultimate destiny. It will come once it's made palatable enough or is it here already?

Perhaps we should focus on making better people rather than "better" laws.

Big Problem, Small Solution

A fire gutted Metro Gaisano three days ago. While the fire is now under control, the incident revealed that the city's firefighting capabilities may not be up to the task when it comes to fires in large buildings. It's a sobering thought: what if there's a fire on the tenth floor of a building? How will our firefighters handle it? Why are we only thinking this now!?

I wrote before how when the government is faced with a problem, it always takes dumbest and most oppressive approach to deal with it. Like clockwork, the mayor is now mulling a temporary ban on the construction of tall buildings. Again, the answer is always to enact small-minded policies which hamper the Filipino and the development of the Philippines. Instead of upgrading our firefighting capabilities, developers will just have to limit themselves to however many floors the government decides is best. Metro Gaisano only went up to six floors. Coupled with his penchant for closing establishments, Mayor Osmena could be the most anti-business leader in the whole Philippines.

How depressing. Whereas high-rises and skyscrapers were once symbols of progress, they're too scary and daunting for us simple folk.  I don't get it. Is this timidity, no, cowardice a common Filipino trait? Do we even dream big anymore? I digress.

Our ladders are too short. Therefore, we just need to build smaller and shorter buildings. Got it. It's totally not subconsciously emasculating at all. Gosh, we're so smart. How silly those people in Tokyo and New York must feel when they see how much smarter we are. We've figured it all out.

I love and hate being correct.

Troubles Elsewhere

What a week it's been.

Off in the South, you have some group I bet nobody has ever heard off until recently, take over Marawi City. Government forces are taking it back street by street but it's been a rough going to put it mildly. The most recent incident is some eleven army soldiers being killed in a friendly fire bombing. Why is it called "friendly" fire when it hardly is? 

In the North, some guy shot up a casino. Who knows? People were panicking that it was a terrorist attack. Now it seems it wasn't. Regardless, a lot of people died.

The Philippines being an archipelago has its advantages and disadvantages. One advantage is that problems are localized to some degree. Terrorist activity is more common in Mindanao than elsewhere. One disadvantage however, is that it can be hard to care about something when it seems so far away. It's cruel to say but one has to be mindful of one of the fundamental flaws of Filipino culture. Relationships are a series of rings extending outward from the Filipino. He cares for those closest to him first but grows more and more indifferent the further the ring gets. "So there's a hubbub in Mindanao. Typical. Big deal." When news of the gunman in Manila broke, people were more interested in the latest NBA game. It's hard to feel.

But I have a hunch we'll all be feeling something soon enough.

Rowdy Rody's Dirty Laundry

Dirty Laundry

This administration is a gold mine. God bless Duterte. God bless him.

Go ask the older folks if they have ever seen a President do this. Ask them if they've ever seen a President engage in brazen prime time mudslinging to such a nasty degree. De Lima always fancied herself as some kind of smart ass so why bother playing at taking the high road? You can't beat her at pompous moral posturing so a different tactic is required. Who knew that for El Jefe, that would mean accusing her of having an affair with a married man and implying that they benefit from drug money? 

You should have seen De Lima. It was unexpected. She was totally unprepared, the poor devil. It was a kidney punch.

Critics say it was dirty and uncalled for but in case you haven't noticed, we are well past that point already. It seems everything is getting pried open in the Philippines. Sure it was nasty, but in a way, it was tactically brilliant. Today was the Senate hearing on the extrajudicial killings. Thanks to Duterte, nobody can pay attention to the proceedings. All people can do is look at De Lima and think, "Wow. Somebody is actually banging this dumpy broad?", and everyone will forget what actually happened.

UN-necessary

The papers today reported that Duterte got fed up with international criticism of the extrajudicial killings so he threatened to leave the United Nations. I laugh."Threaten"? Threaten who? Let's not pretend we're a member of the security council. We're more of a dependent than anything. What about all the foreign aid? Yolanda?

But of course, it's all straightened out later that Duterte was exaggerating and so forth. You know, it's getting a little tiresome. On the one hand, we're supposed to take Duterte seriously but on the other, we're not supposed to take him seriously. He means what he says except when he doesn't? My advice: Duterte should cross his fingers and show it to us when he speaks off the cuff. It'll be our little sign; our little in-joke. If he crosses his fingers, he doesn't mean it and he's just trolling the media. Tee-hee!

Look, he's mad at the U.N. Understandable. It really is a useless organization. But he shouldn't make so much noise. If I've learnt anything from the many dictators, armed groups and genocidal maniacs in the world, it's a safe bet to just ignore the U.N. Just ignore it. I doubt the U.N. sincerely cares about brown people Filipino lives any more than we do.

I hope this man is President for life.

Drug Dudes Done In Dirt Cheap

The Philippines is kind of like a kitchen at midnight. Turn on the lights and you'll see it's swarming with cockroaches. Try to focus on a problem and you'll see how it's even more terrible than you imagined.

I knew the Philippines had a drug problem but I never thought it was this bad. Suspected drug peddlers and users are coming out of the woodwork, out of trees and manholes it seems, to "surrender" to the government. This is a little odd to me. See, people are admitting to their crimes but they just sign a thing? Acknowledge they've been bad little boys and promise not to do it again? Some have suggested hooking these people up with jobs instead of drugs but where are you going to find jobs for thousands of people who have admitted to a history of crime or drug use and most of whom probably aren't that bright to begin with?

Those who don't surrender are simply shot. It seems people are being killed daily. Instead of crying about the end of the "rule of law", let's play the devil's advocate.

Realistically speaking, a Filipino life is fairly worthless in the grand scheme of things. Years of rampant population growth coupled with general neglect (governmental or societal) to improve our human capital have made the Philippines a country filled with disposable people. Hell, I know I'm not exempt from this calculation. Someone could kill me tomorrow and it wouldn't even matter. Sure, some of the people who know me would probably be a little bummed but that feeling will eventually pass.

What I'm saying is that the Philippines, a country of about ninety-eight million people and rising, can absorb these losses. Maybe we can stand to lose a few hundreds, thousands or even a million? If a million Filipinos disappeared, would anyone notice? I doubt it. People hardly notice each other as it is. 

Maybe the lack of outrage over the spate of killings means that the people have finally realized and come to terms with the glaring truth that was always staring them in the face like a beggar on the other side of the car window. Life is cheap in the Philippines. If you aren't being slaughtered like a pig in the name of progress, you're busy being milked like a cow for all your ungrateful dependents. People are treated like cattle, from cradle to crave, being herded through the various institutions happy to mold them into the perfect worker/consumer. Employers treat their very replaceable employees like dirt because they're dirt cheap. We even export our surplus meat to foreign markets and call it heroic.

So what's a few deaths honestly?

Down

Been feeling down lately. Maybe it's the weather. Dark skies, strong rains...

Yeah, it's totally the weather and not my own self-inflicted misery.

Cebu Flood 2016 Edition

You know, you'd think that since we're a tropical country, we would anticipate things like this. But it seems it just keeps happening. What a terrible Friday that was. It rains for an hour and suddenly everything goes down the toilet. Granted, it was a particularly strong rain but the effects of it were disproportionate. Major portions of the city were paralyzed, commuters stranded and misery everywhere.

Philippine weather has two settings: intolerably hot and unbearably wet.

It was the two infrastructure problems of Cebu coming together in a marriage made in hell: bad traffic and bad  flood drainage. Oh, but I'm sure our leadership is hard at work on this. We've only had this problems for years. Killing a few criminals should fix this. That's the only solution our leaders seem to obsess over.

Wait till it's dry season and we forget about the other half of the year.

Sympathy For A Devil

Last Monday, a funeral service was held for Jeffrey Diaz, also known as "Jaguar", and the "number one" drug dealer of Central Visayas. He was killed in a shootout with police on June 17. It's pretty much accepted that he was going to surrender but was rubbed out so he wouldn't give away the crooked politicians and police that protected him. Of course, everything about this is shrouded in mystery. Just swallow the official story line of "drug lord gets killed and deserved it" and try not to think too deeply on the matter or its implications.

Was there celebration? Well, people weren't jumping for joy on the streets and handing out candy or anything. I doubt the average Juan ever even heard of Jeffrey. Just another corpse. Perhaps common people have the decency not to show their happiness, unlike Mayor Tomas who couldn't help but gloat  and brag about handing out generous reward money to the police who shot the guy.

Anyway, an estimated two thousand and five hundred people attended Jeffrey's funeral procession. Some of them were even wearing shirts with Jeffrey's name and face on it. There's official Jeffrey "Jaguar" Diaz merch apparently.

How could so many people come out in support of someone who everyone says is a drug lord? You'd think that the election of Duterte meant people hated these guys. When asked, the attendees would invariably describe Jeffrey as "kind". He was mabait. Jeffrey would hand out Christmas gifts and stuff. He'd give away a few kilos of rice here and there. Who knew people's souls were so cheap?

I've heard the Jaguar being called a modern day "Robin Hood". That doesn't sit well with me. Robin Hood robbed the rich to give to the poor. I don't recall the story being Robin Hood getting rich from giving meth to the poor. Heh, is this what "giving back to the community" means? It's like some macabre fairy tale. A man selling drugs to the poor and using the profits to keep the poor alive to buy more drugs.

The more I think about it, Jeffrey really was no different than your average politician. That's how it goes here; just give the poor free shit and they'll sell themselves to you. The mentality is also similar to those who support vigilante killings. Who cares about the means as long as it accomplishes a "noble" end? Who cares where the food comes from as long as we get it.

The same sickness runs through everything, it seems.

Killing Mary Jane

Mary Jane Veloso, if you remember, was a Filipina who was caught smuggling heroin into Indonesia. The punishment for such a crime in Indonesia is death.

"Outrageous!" was the cry of the masses. "Human rights!" Filipinos, many of whom travel overseas, sympathized with her. She was the right character for the story that was to be told for mass consumption. Ah yes, the poor, exploited Filipino overseas worker. We all know that one. Her case made headlines and the government gave this incident more attention than it usually does in matters concerning the Filipinos' well being. Hell, even Manny Pacquiao visited her and gave her some money and a bible or something. Back then, Pnoy wanted a nice feel-good story to give his numbers a little boost. It kind of worked. Her execution was stayed while the rest of the other foreigners who were caught were met their ends.

What's the point of this?

Apparently, society now feels that it is morally acceptable to summarily execute criminals, especially those involved in drug-related crimes. Therefore, it ought to have no problem then with Mary Jane getting the axe. Why not?  Just smoke her ass. Bang! Bang!

Before you cry about how she was duped and how it was someone else who planted the drugs, think on what you're crying about. You're arguing for her innocence, yes? Evidence? Circumstances? Isn't that what people typically do in, hmm what was it called? A trial? Oh yeah. So she gets a trial because she's sympathetic enough to you but the regular filth on our streets don't? In this way, supporting Duterte's plan to kill the bad guys without a trial yet trying to find reasons to keep Mary Jane alive after she's been found guilty in a court, is hypocrisy.

There is the central conceit that lies in the heart of Duterte and his fans' support for extrajudicial killings. The conceit is that the people that are going to be (and are being) killed are all, without exception, irredeemable scumbags who are nothing like the saintly Mary Jane. We know "deep in our hearts" that Mary Jane is innocent just as we all know "deep in our hearts" that the weekly corpse on the street was no doubt guilty as sin. Feelings. Because that's what it all comes down to doesn't it, when you take due process out of the equation? It all comes down to how good the sob story of the wrongdoer is. If Indonesia were to adopt our mentality, Mary Jane would have been shot shortly after the discovery of the drugs and Joko Widodo would have taken a page from Duterte and told us to go fuck ourselves.

Oh but we're only going to kill the really bad guys like drug lords. Uh huh. The Davao Death Squad didn't kill only drug lords. Don't be naive. It's mental programming. "Drug lord" is mentioned a lot so that when we hear about how some alleged criminal got shot, we've already been trained to imagine him as the worst of the worst regardless of the circumstance. It's classical political strategy to paint your intended victim in the worst possible extreme. Imagine the Indonesian media painting a not so flattering picture of Mary Jane as yet another  disrespectful foreigner among many, feigning ignorance  and bringing the drug menace to their country. See? It's all a matter of perspective. Feelings. We feel you're either innocent or guilty.

It may seem I'm against the killing of criminals but it's a little complicated. I'll explain my stance another time.

Just wanted to rant.

Two Cities

I was gone the last two and half weeks to visit relatives in California. That was my fourth trip to that state, I think, and the sense of excitement that you get from visiting America for the first time lessens every subsequent trip you make. Not to say the whole trip was a bad experience but your perspective changes and you begin to see that the problems first world people face are not that different from us here in the third world "developing" countries.

Take water for instance. Cebu was in the middle of a nasty drought when I left. The rains have come at last, for all the good (and ill) that brings, but rainfall in California has been inadequate for the past five years. You wouldn't know it from all the lovely green lawns in suburbia but elsewhere was a depressing swathe of brown. We passed a small wildfire in fact, on the highway. All that dead grass makes good kindling for a stray cigarette thrown from some careless tourist's car window.

Traffic too was noticeably worse than my previous visits though still not as bad as the traffic here in Cebu. Manila traffic is in a whole different level of hell, of course. But it was plain to see that the car culture that pervades L.A. and it's neighboring cities is pressing its limits. They still have much room to solve the problem unlike the conditions here where limited space, over-development and lack of government funds make solutions difficult. If only our political leadership cared more about the development of the city instead of their petty political feuds and pretentious posturing.

It was nice to see the rest of the family again.

Fanboy Tommy

Tomas Osmena is Mayor again and already he's running his mouth on how he's going to promote the kind of "justice" Duterte is known for. Taking the election of El Jefe as a sign that vigilantism is now socially acceptable (possibly), he's trying to pick up where he left off. Recently, he promised fifty thousand pesos to policemen for each criminal killed. 

Mind you, this post isn't so much about the killings as it is the distasteful and unbecoming attitude of our newly elected Mayor. If you ask me, I think he's a poser and probably compensating for something. He's like an entitled brat playing tough guy. He may do what he thinks he must, but he'll never have the charm and charisma Duterte has and that's really not saying much. He's just a fanboy who wishes he was like his idol. What a joke.

Today, a suspected robber was killed by a policeman and already Tomas is boasting how he's going to pay the officer a reward. When asked by reporters about where this blood money comes from, the Mayor simply responded that it was "none of their business". Wow! Ka isog! Well, if the money comes from the public coffers, it kinda is our business, Tommy. Perhaps by saying it's none of our business, he's implying he's paying it out of his own wallet? In that case, I respect him for being willing to personally bankroll vigilantism; putting his own money where his mouth is.

Already Tommy is publicly bragging that it's one for Tommy and zero for Duterte in the imaginary scorecard for kills. How cringe-worthy. He's like that kid in class who thinks he's the hot shit but you just end up feeling embarrassed for.

Perhaps I'll write about my thoughts on vigilantism tomorrow.

Leadfoot

You know what irritates me to no end?

Leadfoot taxi drivers. I run into them at least 80% of the time.

What are they, you might ask? There are many taxi drivers out there who drive their cars without any sort of finesse whatsoever. What they do is slam into the pedals instead of slowly pressing or slowly releasing them. Leadfoot drivers stomp on the gas then stomp on the brakes then stomp on the gas again.

Stop-go-stop-go-stop. The worst part is when they have to slowly come to a halt. Instead of slowly stepping on the brake, they just step on it multiple times. Stop-stop-stop-stop. I thought my head would separate from my spine.

I need a massage or something.

Missed Philippines

Last week, I joined the procession of the International Eucharistic Congress as they marched from the Capitol to Plaza Independencia. There were so many people, more people than was expected. It was a peaceful and somber affair. The slow shuffling and repetitive chanting were hypnotic in a way and put me in a contemplative mood.

It was a pretty big deal since so many people joined it. I've heard some people even put the number to a million although that's probably exaggeration. Perhaps a little below a quarter million is more reasonable. The event was so remarkable in fact, that the national newspapers hardly mentioned it at all. Instead the front pages were dedicated to that Pia Wurtzback broad and Vic Sotto's wedding. I guess since it didn't happen in Manila, it didn't happen at all.

Sheesh.

Hover Thy Father

The big thing in Cebu at the moment is the International Eucharistic Congress. It's supposed to be a big deal but I'm not sure why. People keep saying it's important so it must be? I don't know.

It's just a bunch of priests talking about how important the mass is. The last time people were talking about the mass, it was because some priest decided to wheel around in a "hoverboard".

Why do they call it a "hoverboard" if it doesn't actually hover?

I thought it was amusing despite the impropriety of it all. Frankly, church is pretty boring. The outrage over the incident was understandable. "The Eucharistic celebration is the highest form of worship", the self-righteous Catholics huffed. True. However, this is a culture that tastelessly holds masses in the middle of noisy malls and shopping centers; spirituality drowned in a sea of materialism. So much for the sacred...

Keep on rollin' padre.

The Great Storyseller

Floyd Mayweather boasted today about how he was "greater than the greatest". I learned about this since his statement was apparently important enough to make most of the front pages of the national and local newspapers. I used to think the headlines were for things of great importance, not for the "greater than the greatest". I digress. Floyd is referring to Muhammad Ali, a boxer who was known as the "greatest" and many would consider him so. Floyd is, in effect, claiming he is bigger than the boxing Jesus.

Me and my mother were having breakfast one morning. Small talk eventually led to the MayPac bout because of course it would. She didn't follow boxing but told me that she hoped Manny would win. I asked her why she hoped so. She told me that she'd like to see Manny win because that Floyd person was so arrogant.

I was reminded immediately of pro wrestling. In pro wrestling, you have a good guy fight the bad guy. The bad guy would do all sorts of things to get the crowd to hate him. He'd insult the local sports team, denounce America and so on. The logic was that people would pay good money to see the bad guy get his ass kicked by the American hero. It's catharsis. It's nice to see a bad guy get his comeuppance and for good to prevail; the feeling of revulsion, triumph then relief.

Of course, boxing isn't a fixed fight but the principle is the same. It's Floyd's way of drumming up the hype for the fight. By making arrogant, semi-ridiculous boasts, Floyd is not only generating buzz for the media but also getting people to hate him enough to want to pay to hopefully see his ass kicked. Ironically, Muhammad Ali knew this as well. Why do you think Muhammad Ali called himself the "greatest" in the first place? He knew how it worked. He crafted his own cocky persona that would generate the hype and hate. 

We are all salesmen. In our everyday interactions with other people and society at large, we are selling our image. From the way we dress down to the way we walk, we project what we want others to think of us consciously or subconsciously. We are all the heroes of our own storybooks; the leading actors of the movies of our lives and like movie stars, it is necessary to craft an image with wide appeal and fit for mass consumption.

Floyd is probably only acting like an arrogant prick for the reasons I already stated. Even if he is an arrogant person in real life, that's irrelevant. What matters is his persona and the interest it generates. You have to understand Americans. They like a guy with a cocky swagger. The tastes have changed but there is still an appeal to what he does.

You look at Manny and you already know the storyline. It's so obvious. In fact, it seems almost made-to-order for the Philippine market. A man from humble origins... poor and downtrodden Kid Kulafu. He fought his way to the top. He fought for his country... for us. Jeez, that's cheesy but it works. Filipinos eat it up.

But the real reason why Manny is so beloved by the country is that he lived the part. He's the real method actor. Manny did in fact, come from humble origins. The best stories are those with a bit of truth in them, which is why despite Floyd's boastful claims, it's easy for people who pay attention to see through the gimmick.

We are all salesmen. PNoy for example, isn't a very good salesman and is a very lousy actor in the tragicomedic play that is his life. The son of heroes is he! He is honorable and pure. He is light and his enemies are darkness. Anyone against him is corrupt and allied with the forces of evil. I've written before how PNoy is a victim of his own mythology. What happens when the actor does not match the character? The best stories are those with truth in them. PNoy liked to sell this idea that he was righteous solely because he came out of the vagina of a righteous person. But the actor did not play his part very well. He wasn't who he said he was. That's why his approval rating is so low. You can't make a sale when nobody is buying.

Look at Mar Roxas. He's even worse. Mar likes to direct traffic, haul bags of onions and other menial tasks in an attempt to look relatable to the common man. Nobody bought it. He looked ridiculous. Poor actor. Poor salesman.

Can you imagine a man like Jaime Zobel de Ayala manning a counter at McDonalds in order to look relatable to food service personnel? How about Lucio Tan collecting garbage to appear like a good public servant? You can't sell false stories. Not even businessmen tycoons like them are skilled enough to sell themselves like that. It takes a certain cunning and skill to change roles like a chameleon changes color. It's called charisma.

So in the end, here we have Manny vs. Floyd. It's a battle between a humble and pious Filipino boy vs. the smug American coward. People will pay. People want to see how the movie ends since it really is unpredictable. If Manny wins, songs of victory will be sung and the hero vanquishes the villain. If Floyd wins, then a new tale will be spun from whole cloth to suit the needs of whoever. 

What's your story?