Senator Pacquiao

So I saw a news segment recently about how people have "mixed reactions" to Manny Pacquiao's decision to keep boxing despite being elected a Senator of the Republic of the Philippines. People are concerned that this would split his focus and he wouldn't be able to serve the country well with him training and all. 

For me, it's the opposite. I'm very happy that he's boxing again. This means that he won't be working hard as a senator and therefore, he won't do as much damage to the country as he normally might.

The people expressing dismay over Manny's life choices operate from the mistaken premise that the Senate, and the entire legislative branch of the country for that matter, are doing good for the country. Nope. The legislature is filled with either incompetent celebrity boobs or corrupt greedy assholes. It's not an institution worthy of trust.

To put it simply, a senator that's not working is a senator that's not screwing over the Filipino people. Good on Manny. Let him box. In fact, his track record as the number one absentee back when he was in the House is something to celebrate. By not doing anything, he's doing great! Thanks for not causing damage!

Besides, Manny isn't exactly senator material. I won't say he's dumb like other people assume because he's not. He's probably more knowledgeable in the art of boxing than the average person. His intelligence lies in the sweet science but on the senate floor? Perhaps not so. But could you imagine what would happen if Manny Pacquiao devoted his entire physical and mental energies on his senatorial gig? Can you imagine the chaos that a barely comprehensible, religious nut like him can cause? We should be grateful he seems more inclined to hurt Mexicans than us Filipinos.

You be you, Manny.

I Put A Spell On You

So Manny Pacquiao earned a victory against Timothy Bradley. Well, good for him. You may think I don't like Manny Pacquiao given the tone of my writings but it's not him I don't like. Rather, it's the legions of "pinoy pride" mouth-breathers that annoy me. I'd rather credit a man's own hard work and perseverance than the notion that being born somewhere gives you magic powers. "Genius has no country", as Rizal said. Besides, how can one reconcile "pinoy pride" of Manny Pacquiao's victory when he had to go abroad to a foreign country to succeed?

Anyway, the funniest thing during the fight was when "Mommy D", Manny Pacquiao's mom, began pointing to Bradley with the bad finger on one hand while clutching a rosary and prayer slips (?) on the other. She was then visibly muttering stuff to herself... or at someone. The Internet ate it up and joked that she was casting a hex on Bradley.

Here in Cebu, the term is "barang". Barang is understood as a curse or some kind of evil sorcery used to bring sickness or misfortune against someone, like an enemy. Personally, I think it's horse dung but the mouth-breathers are the kind to believe in that sort of thing. More entertainment for everyone, I guess.

Maybe she was just trolling.

Heroes End

It finally happened. It finally freakin' happened. The Hitman series was finally ruined by Square Enix. Also, Manny Pacquiao lost.

So... how about that fight yesterday?

It was bound to happen yet there's shock and disbelief. What were people expecting? You can't win them all.

I don't really care for boxing. I think it's immoral and depraved. I feel like it's wrong to see people beat each other for money. At least pro-wrestling is fake but I digress. Manny Pacquiao seemed to walk right into a knockout punch like he wasn't paying attention. Either his opponent was extremely lucky or Manny was careless, either way, it was decisive. Bet you can't claim it was rigged now, eh?

How many Mexicans does it take to knock Manny out? Just Juan. (canned laughter)

But seriously though, knockouts do terrible damage to the brain. So why did he lose? Some commentators suggest Manny wasn't "hungry" anymore and his success made him complacent. Mommy Dionisia (Manny's mother) blames the pastors and attributes Manny's previous success to his Christian faith. Manny is "born again" you see. Somehow I find the former more convincing. I don't think an omnipotent and all-powerful God gives half a rat's ass about a boxing match.

The Philippine Star has an article suggesting the loss is a "national day of mourning". Excuse me? Hundreds are dead in Compostela from a huge typhoon and a boxer's loss is cause for national mourning? Come on people, get a grip. Fans online and in social media are all upset and crying. Well, if you project all your "pinoy pride" on one person, it's bound to disappoint you.

I never got the whole "I'm proud to be a Filipino because of Manny Pacquiao" thing. I mean, I just don't get it. My mind struggles to make logical connections between being proud of your collective race because of the success of an individual. Does his success imply all of us make good boxers? That cannot be true. Does it imply the drive to excel and succeed, as exemplified by him, are traits exclusive to Filipinos? That's not true either. Does that mean we "produced" a champion like Manny and therefore we should be proud of ourselves? Nah, if you recall, it took a foreigner named Roach and another foreign promoter to recognize Manny's talent. If anything, we should be proud that our poverty and wretched living conditions forced Manny to punch people for a living in the first place. Is that the point? I hope not.

My bold prediction that Manny Pacquiao will be the next President is a bit less likely now.

Little Victory

Suddenly, everybody's a boxing expert.

So the Pacman won a narrow victory against Marquez yesterday and didn't get the quick knockout everyone wanted to see. But why? Some people say this could be the decline of our hero. Some say that his opponent was just better prepared.

I think that the Pacman doesn't really care that much any more. Think about it. When you have all that money and power, smiling and styling in all those houses and cars and surrounded by more false friends than you can count, why bother? He's just not hungry anymore and desperate boxers are the deadlier and more entertaining kind.

Can we stop talking about it now and move on as a nation?

Visions of Doom

The Pacman won.

In what turned out to be an extraordinarily normal bout, Pacman won by unanimous decision. Of course, his "fans" bitched about the match being boring and how people were leaving the stadium during the last part of the match. The ingrates. Show some respect. Two people are punishing themselves and people moan about how there was no excitement? Be thankful nobody got put out for good.

What's next for the Pacman? Well, I'm pretty sure a match with Mayweather won't happen. Looking closely at the Pacman's current standing and taking into account every possible factor, I predict that the Pacman will be the next President of the Philippines. It is the only logical outcome.

You heard it here first.

Pride

Manny Pacquaio, which henceforth shall be referred to as Pacman, is a world famous boxer. In fact, he could arguably be the best pound-for-pound boxer alive today. Also, he happens to be Filipino.

The reason I'm writing about him is because he has a hyped match coming up against some poor fellow named Mosley. As usual, Pacman's fans are getting all excited and I get all irritated. It's not so much that they like him, go ahead and cheer your idol people, but what annoys me is all this Pinoy pride they suddenly feel. "Pacman is the best boxer in the world so I'm proud of my country." Go ahead and look at any YouTube video of Pacman and the comments are just full of these specific strains of stupidity.

What does the Pacman have to do with being proud of the Philippines? I don't think that we should be proud that our country is so poor, Pacman had to resort to getting punched and punching strangers for a living. We are a Christian country, right? Should we even be applauding boxing, a sport that's all about rocking another man's brain until he passes out for the mere amusement of spectators? Hmm, if I were a devout Christian, that seems...immoral don't you think? And we're all about morality with the RH bill controversy and all, right? But I digress.

Anyway, Pacman is a successful guy, that much is true. He's won championships, he's wealthy, he sings (badly), acts in (terrible) movies and is even a member of Congress. The question is, did he succeed because of his country or in spite of it? Well, there is no answer. One could argue that we should be proud of the Pacman's individual accomplishments instead and praise him for his willpower, courage and determination. Or we could spout gibberish like "Pinoy pride" and attribute his success to being Filipino because the Philippines sucks so much, it toughened him up to deal with all sorts of bullshit like getting punched in the face. You decide.

Also, I hate that Charice singer very much.

Nothing Special

Just another Sunday...

You know, I never thought I would write this but playing World of Warcraft... is a lot of work. Seriously, waking up in the morning to do daily quests to earn imaginary money to buy fast cars/dragons, checking in on the auction house or market like people in Wall Street or something is pretty scary. I feel like a sucker yet I can't stop somehow. One of these days I guess I'll have to just sever my hand...

Today was the day of the big boxing match/curb stomp between Manny Pacman and some guy named Cotto who didn't even try to look intimidating in the posters. Man, Cotto was one tough bastard. It wasn't pretty but he went twelve rounds of being just punched in the face. His offense was terrible but in the end, he's millions richer. Anyway, what is it about these hyped-up matches? It seems everyone is suddenly a boxing aficionado and a fucking expert commentator. "Oh, Manny must leverage his speed." No shit, which restaurant placemat did you read that from you armchair moron?

Everyone watches it. Even criminals and terrorists shut in to watch it as evidenced by the low crime rate on such days. It seems the joy of watching two strangers beating each other to a bloody pulp for our amusement brings out the best in all of us and rekindles our common humanity.