So now I'm gonna write a big article and since I don't know what to write, I'm going to write something I'm passionate about, video games! Specifically, the Hitman Series by IO Interactive and published by Eidos Interactive. What better way to start the new year than writing about a video game featuring violence and murder for profit?
There are four games in the series namely and in order: Hitman:Codename 47, Hitman 2:Silent Assassin, Hitman:Contracts and Hitman:Blood Money. There was a movie released based on the Hitman series but that deserves its own article about how hilariously stupid and unfaithful it was to the games and how incredibly average it was. There were tits in the movie though so it wasn't all bad. There's also a novel but shit, who wants to read a novel based on a video game? Come on.
Characters
The main character and titular hitman of the game is a man known as Agent 47. Well, he's not really an ordinary man. 47 is a genetic experiment, a clone made from the DNA of five of the toughest sons of bitches in the world. His name comes from the end numbers on the barcode on the back of his shiny bald head. He has many aliases but let's just call him 47. While he's not a super human, his strength, speed and intelligence are far above the average Joe Sixpack. He's been created, raised and trained to be a perfect assassin and good lord is he ever. His favored method of assassination is strangulation via his trademark portable fiber wire garrote. As far as personality goes, 47 is sarcastic, cold, distant and emotionally detached. He likes animals though like little bunnies and canaries. (I'm not kidding) His morality and personality is explored in the different games. I shall expound on this later.
His handler is Diana Burnwood who acts as 47's support as well as provide him contracts from "The Agency". Most of the time she's just a voice...a sexy, sexy, voice over a laptop providing 47 with intel on the latest target of assassination. She seems to care about 47, at least, enough to save his life on two separate games: in Contracts and Blood Money. The relationship of Diana and 47 is an interesting one.
Agent Smith is an American CIA agent who has connections to The Agency. He's mostly comic relief. Every game has a mission wherein 47 has to save his sorry ass after being captured often in his underwear. Smith is very patriotic as evidenced in one crazy awesome mission in Blood Money where he payed 47 to rescue the goddamned President of the United States.
Mei Ling is a Chinese woman abducted into put into a brothel by Chinese crime lord Lee Hong and later prostituted herself to a Japanese crime lord, Hayamoto. 47 saves her both times. She's the only person ever to have kissed 47 and he wasn't to happy about human contact. 47 almost chocked on his own vomit if i remember right.
The International Contract Agency or "The Agency"(duh) is 47's employer. They have ties to CIA, KGB, M16, NSA, the UN and probably every major intelligence network in the world. They are mostly neutral and most people they have 47 kill are drug lords, criminals, pedophiles, crime kingpins, corrupt politicians, and really naughty people. Their motto is Merces Letifer.
The Franchise is The Agency's rival and the antagonist in Blood Money. The Franchise also handle assassinations but they use poorly made clones that can't hold a candle to 47. They figure prominently in Blood Money where they almost destroy The Agency and 47 along with it. They even employed assassins to try and kill 47 but he promptly blows them away with ease with his pimp hand like the amateurs they were.
Our hero, ladies and gentlemen...
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