I was listening to the car radio the other day and there was this ad for something called a "masculine wash". I thought to myself, "Masculine wash? That doesn't sound very masculine at all." I've heard about feminine wash but not masculine wash. I listened some more and then it hit me. Masculine wash is exactly what you think it is. It's a care product for your privates to "ensure a fresh feeling of confidence from morning to evening." Yeesh.
I can understand feminine wash. I mean, I think it would probably need more care considering it's internal and that's where, you know, babies come from? But honestly, why would you need masculine wash? A penis isn't a complicated instrument people. You don't need a manual. Yet, it seems we need a special little bottle for it now. You neanderthal lumberjacks with the soap have been doing it wrong all this time.
I like to think of feminine wash as more of a medicine really. The commercials for it on TV always tout the science like PH balance and antibacterial benefits to the product. In the commercial for the masculine wash however, it mentioned "confidence and fresh feeling" and all that hoopla. Masculine wash is a damned cosmetic product! Did society turn upside down while I was away that we are now selling cosmetic products to men and no-nonsense products to women? How much more metro can a man be? What's next, a pubic hair styling conditioner?
I swear, the pussification of the modern man is reaching critical mass. It has to stop.
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