Goodbye Pig

Today, I had my dog put down.

For the past three or so days, Jackie couldn't walk. At first, I thought something was just wrong with one of her legs and that it would be better after some rest. It didn't and she became unable to lift herself up on all fours. She developed a nasty pressure sore on her elbow that looked like a crater.

She wouldn't eat. I had to hold her up on the grass to get her to do her business but then it just became too stressful for her. One evening, while trying to help her urinate, I slipped and couldn't catch her in time. She fell sideways into the mud but the worst part was that she had this look of exhaustion and resignation on her face and just laid there not even trying to get up. I took her in and placed her on soft mats.

She spent her last days laying down. Her cries kept me up at night. I would go down and turn her over to ease the pain and prevent another sore. She tried hard to get up but couldn't seem to twist her hip. We tried to comfort her any way we could. We gave her water when she was thirsty and cleaned up after her. As the days went on, she cried more and more but she didn't want anything to eat or drink. She would quiet down only if somebody would stay with her and pat her head. It seemed that the loneliness was worse than the hunger. Perhaps dogs are more human than I thought.

The vet said that all he could offer were painkillers but that would only delay the inevitable. Truth be told, Jackie was a very old dog; twelve years old in fact. This was not unexpected but it seemed to all come so suddenly. The vet came over and after his assessment, told me it had to be done.

I didn't want to see it but I felt compelled to stay. I patted her on the head gently as the doctor used the first syringe. I patted her as she trembled a little. The doctor assured me that the procedure was painless. I left when they used the solution that stops the heart and went to my room instead. I'd be lying if I said I didn't cry. I did. I couldn't help it. I cried alone in my room as I always do in  moments like this. I thought I wouldn't. After all, Jackie was just a dog and that she was a very old dog. Still, it was a truly sad and pathetic sight to see.

We buried her underneath a Kaymito tree in a shady part of the yard. The place was a bit overgrown but peaceful and cool. A stone slab and her bowl are all that indicate her final resting place.

Do dogs have souls? My mother believes that when an illness is about to afflict a family member, the dog heroically absorbs it instead. A wives' tale but a comforting thought. I feel regret that I took Jackie for granted many times and that I wasn't the best dog owner in the world. But then again she was a simple dog. She was lazy and thought that the best thing in the world was to eat food. That was easy to satisfy of course, especially since I am of a similar mindset. She would practically eat anything you offered her. My mother and I called her "The Fat Pig", joking that she was a greedy omnivorous pig disguised as a dog. Once, I gave her a banana and she ate it. She would even eat the bland Tambis fruits if you gave it to her.

I miss her already.

At least her suffering is over and that there's no more cries of pain but I think I'm still going to have a hard time sleeping tonight.

Endless Legend OST - Time of Change

Ringing

I think I might have injured my left ear. My ears ring all the time but the ringing in that ear has become worse. 

I hope it's nothing serious.

Cold Water

By now you've probably heard about the so-called "ALS Ice Bucket Challenge", wherein people dump cold water on themselves for charity.

The mechanics of this stunt still elude me. Is the challenge that you either donate a hundred dollars to an ALS research group or pour ice water on yourself if you don't? Because if it is, then what's so fun about showing everyone that you'd rather waste water than donate money? But oh, it's for "awareness". Whatever.

To be fair, the game has allegedly raised a hundred million dollars for charity. Well that's good. I don't want to throw cold water on that. I guess it worked... sort of? I still think it's stupid despite everything.

I find it disturbing that a meme on social media that trends just because a bunch of celebrities and "important" people started doing it, has this kind of power to set our priorites. I mean, there's so many other causes in this world. People have the time to dump water on themselves but don't have the time to pick up after themselves or help their immediate neighbor. Why ALS, honestly? Ebola is killing everyone in Africa. People are starving in the streets right here.Why not use that money to do actual good for someone yourself instead of donating it to some nebulous institution somewhere?

Even the President's favorite attack dogs; De Lima and Kim did it too. Come on, isn't there a country they should be fixing? You know this whole thing just smacks, of "look-at-me" narcissism.

What silly thing will they think of next?

Megadeth - Symphony of Destruction

Left 4get

I played a bit of Left 4 Dead 2 recently to bust some stress. What could relieve stress better than killing zombies?

Boy oh boy, was I wrong. A lot of the people don't play L4D 2 anymore and guess who's left? Noobs, that's who. It was pure horror; friendly fire every second, complete lack of awareness, horrible skills and lots and lots of lag.

I think my blood pressure shot up instead.

Short Cuts: Guardians of the Galaxy

I've been a little busy and in a very bad mood lately so let's do this quickly.

I didn't like this movie. I just didn't. Entertainment is subjective. What one person finds entertaining may be boring to others. That being said, if you already saw this movie and enjoyed it, good for you.

Well, that's all.

Just kidding. I guess I owe it to the almost-handful of people who read this blog to explain my reasons for disliking what appears to be the movie everyone just loves to death.

"Humor"

This movie has only three things going for it: its humor, its retro soundtrack and its comic book nerd appeal. The humor wasn't very funny. Sure, it may have been amusing the first few attempts but it got old fast. The "oh, look at me, don't take me seriously" kind of humor where the characters point at themselves or at their situation and expect us to laugh didn't really work for me. I find absurd humor funnier when the characters do not point out or acknowledge their own situation and instead, leave it to the audience to get it on their own. But such a manner would need subtlety in a movie that's filled to the brim with audience pandering. There was too much expository dialogue at certain points and not enough "set-up then pay-off" kinds of humor. I didn't help that I disliked our main hero played by Chris Pratt. I didn't find Chris Pratt particularly funny and I'm not sure why. The other actors were just okay I guess.

Pandering

Anyway, back to the pandering. My inner cynic was attempting to eat it's way out of my chest again when it came to the soundtrack.  This movie was downright low in shoving in as much old 70's hits as possible. I knew what this was. It was meant to appeal to the old nerds in the audience as well as the people who would feel so happy about themselves in hearing the old pop songs and then congratulate themselves for knowing the names of the songs. "Hey! I remember that song! Cherry Bomb!" It's hipster garbage calculated to stick in your ear and make people feel good and nostalgic and remember the movie in a positive light. The movie takes special care to insert oh-so-serious scenes in between the action and laughs. It felt jarring and poorly done. We go from comedic to super serious like a flip of a switch. The tone whiplash is annoying. In fact, the rather heavy opening sequence doesn't seem to fit with the rest of the movie except to be called back at the end just for the audience to go, "Awww, now Chris Pratt has a chance to do what he couldn't as a kid." How cheap.

Enough

As for comic book nerd appeal, it's already obvious at this point with the over-saturation of comic book based movies today. Frankly, I'm sick and tired of it. I think the only reason I can say I didn't like the movie is because I don't care much for comic books in the first place. I'm not really invested in this universe or any others. Sure, I read a few and can appreciate it for what it is but I'm not so attached to it. You know what, I take pride in not knowing the in-jokes or gags that only the "real fans" would get. At least I know that all that is just pandering. Hollywood can take that nostalgia, "feel good" crap and shove it up its ass.

 The Ugly Truth

Take away these three things and what do you have? Take away the brand name appeal, copyrighted characters and franchise and then what do you have? You have a movie that can't stand on its own. A lazy, bog-standard mediocre space adventure film with a few cool looking fight scenes that treats its audience like easy-to-please dumbasses. I wish the movie tried a little harder to be clever. I wish it didn't act as if it knew it was already gonna make millions of dollars anyway regardless and tried a little harder in general.

It's been a rough couple of days by the way. Just saying.