Ip Man

My friend recommended to me a movie called "Ip Man". I asked myself, what the hell is an "Ip" man? After doing some research, Ip Man is a movie about a man...named Ip Man who punches people. A lot. That's his name, "Ip Man". He's supposed to be some kind of historical figure who trained Bruce Lee or something and that this film is very loosely based on his life and by loosely I mean loose like a Thai prostitute. Anyway, IP MAN!

Our story begins in a small, peaceful Chinese town. But then a bunch of rowdy Northerners roll into town, systematically seeking out Kung Fu masters so they can punch them in the face. Honestly, this is like the plot of every Kung Fu movie ever. I guess complete strangers coming into town to stomp everyone's ass was a common occurrence in China but I digress. The northerners best every single Kung Fu master except Ip Man. Naturally they challenge him and Ip Man was all like, "I want no trouble." You know what that means. Trouble ensues. Ip Man easily owned them with a feather duster because that's how badass he is. It's better than it sounds.

A few years later, it's the Japanese who roll into town to stomp everyone's ass. Ip Man ends up in forced labor. Apparently there's this big underground fight club where Chinese martial artists go up against the karate experts of the Japanese. It is here we are introduced to the two villains, the evil Japanese general (complete with hilarious round eyeglasses) and the honorable- yet-still-somewhat-of-a-dick general. The Chinese fight to earn bags of rice until one day the evil general opens fire on one of Ip Man's pals for no good reason. Ip Man gets real pissed and begs to get in there to rip and tear. They pit Ip Man against ten karate fighters and well, he goes through them like a bad Mexican dinner.

Ip Man, man. Nobody messes with him. More tomorrow.