Ramblings 1

To put it simply, its complicated. Say for example, you're President of some third world country and you decide to buy yourself a Porsche. Is it tasteless? Maybe. Is it wrong? Of course not. Nothing pisses me more than young people being interviewed by "speak your mind" programs telling me how buying a Porsche is wrong. In a poor country, it would be better to give to charity. Fuck you. You know, what a man does with his own money is nobody's business. Too many people running around telling everyone how they should live and spend their money. I've had enough of that shit.

I don't drink beer. It's not that I'm religious, its just that I can't stand that bitter crap. What else? What else? What else? Law School is a bitch. Maybe I should drink but not beer damn it. Rum? I like rum cake so... Maybe when my friends have a drinking session, I'll just bring a slab of rum cake. I probably won't share it.

Criminal Law is boring and difficult. My mind is ready to pop like a can of Pringles. I love Pringles. Mesquite barbecue was the best thing EVER. Now, Pringles is all healthy with berry flavors or seaweed flavors etc. Stupid. Now Pringles is telling me to eat healthier. Shut up and give me sour cream and onion. Nobody eats potato chips flavored blueberry Jesus Christ.

Jesus Christ...catholicism...Hellsing! Shit, I love that anime. I wonder if a new OVA is out. It's always funny how Catholicism is portrayed in anime. To the Japs, Catholicism is exotic and sexy or something. However, when they start using the imagery and doctrines it gets a little jarring especially since I studied catholic doctrine and actually see how their ruining everything and getting it wrong. I hear Japan is a nation of perverts but that's not fair. Anyway, it is my firm belief that after seeing the demographic trends in Japan, the country will be run by robots in 2080. You read it here first.

What of my country? I expect collapse to occur in 2067 but maybe Jesus will come back. We're too religious for our own good. We believe too much in symbols of purity and justice. We trust people we think are pure at heart like a priest or some Aquino. Everything wrong in the country is also attributed to evil symbols like Arroyo or some kind of abstract like "corruption". We love to canonize and to demonize. We love to build up as much as we love to tear down. We love to create symbols to exalt and to blame. We create a world of angels and demons. It's a fantasy world. We heap our failings on our scapegoats and in our arrogance and disbelief of the greatness of the Filipino people, we ignore the best of us and their accomplishments. Only when we believe in ourselves, accept both the bad and the good, cast away false idols and stop fearing imaginary beasts can we move forward.

I wonder what's for dinner.

Robot (Part 2)

When we last left Chitti, he was just kissed on the cheek by Sana. This triggers interesting feelings for him and triggers another outrageous music video! Let's dance!

Tensions rise between Chitti and Doc. Chitti's feelings for Sana becomes obvious and Sana even tells him that love between woman and machine just ain't natural. It's not meant to be. Chitti is distraught. Dr. Bohra tries to take advantage of this by telling Chitti that Doc doesn't care and that Chitti should hand over his neural programming schema to him. Chitti, however, decides to be a bro and refuse. Chitti remains loyal to Doc anyway despite everything.

The next day, Chitti appears before the Indian military for an evaluation. But wait, I thought Chitti failed the initial evaluation with the Institute? Ah. whatever. Instead of demonstrating his combat prowess, Chitti deliberately fails the exam by reciting poetry about how beautiful Sana is and how war is bad. The Doc is humiliated. Doc becomes angry and hacks Chitti into pieces in his lab with an axe. He exclaims how making Chitti was a mistake. Chitti retorts that he didn't ask to be built or to have feelings. I dunno but I thought this scene was pretty powerful. Chitti looked so sympathetic and Chitti is a robot! The Doc looked like an asshole. Doc is supposed to be the good guy?

So we are treated to a scene where Dr.Bohra negotiates with a German speaking white man about the purchase of a robot army. The funny thing is, Dr.Bohra has a demonstration video showing his robots doing things like shooting civilians, planting car bombs and assassinating presidents. OK, OK, I get it. This guy wants to use technology for evil. He eventually learns of Chitti's fate and retrieves Chitti from the dump. Chitti begs to be fixed and to live and love again. Bohra obliges him but not before installing a little chip that turns you evil. Again, its obvious how evil he is. The chip is colored red and its specifically called a "destruction chip" meant to teach Chitti...to destroy. Looks like Dr.Vaseegaran is in trouble.

Oh no wait, Doc is with Sana running from a guy with a blade in a beach in some kind of comedic scene. Also, there's another music video with ABSOLUTELY NO RELATION to the plot as far as I can tell. They're on a mountain dancing with some tribals. Who knows? I guess life is good without Chitti ruining the chutney.

Chitti crashes Doc's wedding. To drive home the fact that Chitti is now evil, Chitti sports a white skunk stripe on his hair and he shoots abunch of people. After the a crazy awesome chase scene (which I can't find on youtube) Chitti takes Sana to his pleasure palace where Chitti is building his very own robot army. He killed Dr.Bohra too when he got in he way. He also threatens her with rape and has plans to create some kind of evolved "robo-sapien" baby through artificial insemination. Yeah, I don't want to think about it either.

Anyway Doc manages to sneak in the robot base and recue Sana but things get a little messy. The Indian Army confronts Chitti and his army in what is the grand climax of the film. I must say, they spared no expense in the action. Its so over the top and ridiculous that my mind still can't absorb it. I won't spoil what happens but lets just say the "Holy Shit" levels break the scale.

Anyway, doc manages to install a virus or whatever and removes the chip and deactivates the clones. Doc is in court pending capital punishment for his creation when Chitti tells the court that he is technically material evidence and not a person or a witness and can prove Doc is innocent. I don't think I've heard of such jurisprudence. Chitti proves Dr.Bohra was behind it all. Doc gets off the hook but the court orders Chitti be deactivated indefinitely. Tearfully, Doc, Sana and the government allow Chitti to deactivate himself. The film ends in a poignant note with Chitti in a museum fifty years into the future. When a child asks why he was deactivated, he replies, "I started to think."

How did I find the movie? Well, let's put it this way. It had everything and that everything was served with extra servings and dressing. The acting was overacting, the drama was over dramatic, the action scenes were so over the top etc. It's not a bad movie. I thought it was good though off putting. Sometimes there was just too much on the plate you know? The tone was weird too. It started lighthearted then got pretty deep then all screwed up and dark in the end. I dunno what else to say so I'll cop out and use a stupid quantitative scale. 7.5 out of 10.

It was fun.

Robot (Part 1)

Robot AKA "Endhiran" is a Tamil film by S. Shankar. This is an Indian film so I guess its safe to call it a Bollywood picture. Last time I checked, Tamil was a province in southern India. Anyway, its science fiction. Its a movie about a scientist named Dr. Vaseegaran who creates an incredibly human looking android. Hilarity ensues, at least, for a while. Let me break it down. Spoilers incoming needless to say.

Dr. Vaseegaran has been busy researching and building his own android apparently without any funding from any government or entity. With the help of his two comic relief assistants, he creates "Robot"...the titular robot. That's his name. Robot. Let's move on.

Eventually we learn the doctor has a girlfriend named Sana (played by the beautiful Aishwarya Rai) who he's been ignoring for a while due to his work. She whines about it. Gee, building a super advanced humanoid, the likes the world has never seen, must be hard work. Doc brings the robot home to show it to his parents. Doc asks his mom to name the robot. She names it Chitti Babu. I snicker for five minutes. She then asks Chitti to "throw on" the TV. Of course, Chitti can't understand slang and smashes the flat screen to a thousand pieces. Oh, I get it. He's a robot! He takes things literally! Ha ha! Later on, Chitti winds up slashing a corrupt cop who asked him for a "cut"! Ha ha! But seriously, that was a little screwed up.

The doctor confronts Sana and they talk about their relationship. Some sappy romance scene happens and they make up I guess. Then, all of a sudden and without any warning whatsoever, the scene inexplicably shifts to the middle of a desert oasis where the doctor is strumming a guitar. He and Sana sing and dance while the winds blow around them and the camera flies around. Oh yeah, Indian cinema baby! Her costume even changes a few times.

Doc brings Chitti to the "International Robotic Conference" and everyone is impressed except Dr. Bohra, Dr. Vaseegaran's mentor. Immediately you could tell Dr. Bohra is a villain. He looks like a complete asshole. He's envious. It turns out that Bohra had been attempting to create androids of his own but his pupil had succeeded where he had failed. He attempts to ask Chitti to reveal its secret neural programming scheme but fails. Also, Dr. Bohra's androids look like assholes too so you know this guy is trouble. His androids have mean faces with angry brows and a gunmetal black color scheme. He might as well wear a shirt with the word "villain" written on it.

Anyway, Sana wants to "borrow" Chitti for a while and Doc agrees to trust her with an extremely advanced machine for some reason. Hilarity ensues. A music video/montage of how awesome Chitti is commences. Chitti can do anything. He can cook a five star breakfast, clean up the house in a minute, take care of those jerks from the male dormitory and etc. He even helps Sana cheat on her exams using holographic imagery! She get's away with it too! Damn! There's also an over the top action scene where Chitti saves Sana from a band of thugs on a train. It's awesome.

Doc prepares Chitti for his evaluation in some kind of board for AI research. Dr. Bohra is there looking pissed. So far so good until Dr. Bohra tests Chitti. Doc tells Chitti to follow Bohra's orders so Chitti walks backwards, runs around, jumps to and fro, attempts to stab Doc - oh shit! Chitti was nearly "tricked" into stabbing Doc. Dr. Bohra smugly snorts that Chitti cannot distinguish good from bad and friend from foe so he cannot be used by the military. Doc goes home disappointed and the board walks out. Jeez, you'd think the fact Chitti even exists would be a milestone. These people are hard to impress.

On the way home there's a fire downtown. Doc orders Chitti to save people. Chitti saves a few but something unfortunate happens. He saves a girl who was naked in a bath tub without clothing her first. Now, call me crazy, but I think saving your life is more important than being caught naked in public but I dunno, it could be a cultural thing. The girl is so shocked at being naked, she runs away and gets smacked by a truck. Everyone is mad at Chitti for saving her goddamned life in such an insensitive manner. Geez. Anyway, the Doc decides that he's going to teach Chitti morals. He's gonna teach a robot morality. Wow.

Doc goes over some charts on human relationships, tells Chitti to memory scan psychology books and even installs some pheromone detecting hardware but it seems Chitti can't seem to understand. Now personally, I think that its impossible to teach a machine emotion. Emotions can't be broken down into a program. Life is much more complex than - a what the hell, Chitti gets struck by magical lightning. Problem solved.

Chitti learns to feel which is quite amazing. Chitti manages to save a baby too. Sana is so impressed by this, she kisses Chitti and you know where this is going. The villain even remarks, "The story is just beginning!"

The movie goes into intermission and that's all for now.

Robot

Today I was planning on writing about the movie Robot, ("Endhiran" in the original Tamil) an Indian movie. However I realized that this is...an Indian movie which means a lot of song and dance numbers of varying plot relevance and a long run time. Movies are all-day affairs in India so I'm gonna take a break halfway and continue watching it later.

Hopefully I can write a post about it tomorrow.

Fugue

I've been feeling out of it. I can't seem to focus on anything in my head for more than five minutes. It feels like I'm not even myself. I feel like I'm not here. It's like I'm out of my body or something.

What the hell?

Firelake - Dirge for Planet

S.T.A.L.K.E.R. Shadow of Chernobyl

I thought I'd blog about Politics but today is just too damn depressing. If you've read my previous post, I'm not too fond of Valentine's day. I curse this February and all things that are colored red.

I thought I'd blog bout something that makes me happy but since I've been on a shitty movie binge and nothing particularly interesting is going on, looks like its gonna be video games again. Video games on Valentine's...sheesh. I've got a perfect game in mind just for the occasion. It's called: S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Shadow of Chernobyl. It's a game for cool loners like me.

S.T.A.L.K.E.R. is a first person shooter by GSC Game World, a Ukrainian developer and was published in 2007. It takes place in an alternate reality wherein the Chernobyl disaster wasn't all frowns and boo boos. No really, in this universe, a second Chernobyl disaster happens and this time, strange things are all around the area in Chernobyl. Mysterious artifacts, spatial anomalies and horrible mutants plague the area around the plant called "The Zone" but there's scientific discoveries to be had as well as tidy profits for adventurous types. These people are called S.T.A.L.K.E.R.S. and they inhabit the zone for varying reasons. Some seek profit in the lucrative artifact trade or for science.

The story begins with you, The Marked One. You were mistaken for dead and woke up an amnesiac. All you have is a tattoo on your arm marked S.T.A.L.K.E.R. and your PDA with the single entry of "Kill Strelok". What does this all mean? What it means is you should get your ass over to The Zone to find out your past while making lots of money and killing every asshole and mutant that gets in your way. Hey, that's how I saw it.

The graphics in this game look pretty dated. However, there's this mod called "Complete 2009" that increases the quality of the game substantially. It even fixes many of the bugs in the original version. Normally, I don't like mods with my games but this one is absolutely necessary in my opinion. The graphics are so much better and the environments are even scarier.

There's not much I can say about sound. Who remarks about sound in video games anyway? What I will say is that it does its job. The atmosphere is creepy enough. The soundtracks in game are pretty cool. I need to mention that sometimes fellow Stalkers play guitar near campfires sometimes. Its pretty fun to hear. The English dubbing is a little weak. People sound so emotionless sometimes.

Now the gameplay is where S.T.A.L.K.E.R. really draws you in. This game is merciless. I wouldn't call it super realistic but let's just say it demands a little more effort from the normal player. There is no "hammerspace" where you store infinite weapons and ammo. No. You have a backpack and you sort your shit out. If it gets too heavy then screw you. Let's see how fast you can run from the monsters. There is no infinite ammo. Everything is scarce or at a price. You don't run over health kits to heal yourself. You carry them around damnit along with your food. Food? Oh, that's right. You have to eat or you'll starve.

So your lugging around all that shit while exploring the radioactive wastelands of The Zone and navigating through anomalies. What are anomalies? Well, think of them as warped areas unbound by space and time and the laws of physics. Imagine walking down the road only to be suddenly lifted up a hundred feet up the air and then slammed on the pavement with your heavy gear. That's an anomaly. Sometimes anomalies just mercifully shoot lightning and kill you quickly. You can't even see anomalies clearly. You have to move carefully and listen to your Geiger counter and not run around like an idiot.

Aside from the bandits and mean people in general that can kill you in three shots, there are mutants to deal with. Packs of ravenous mutant pseudo dogs roam The Zone. There are "Controllers" than rape your mind from a distance with telepathic powers. There are "Snorks" which are mutated people who leap across the room to maul your face. The worst of them all are "Bloodsuckers". Bloodsuckers are mutant freaks that can claw your face off in one second. They run faster than you and they're invisible. INVISIBLE.

This game will try to kill you at every opportunity. This game will chew you and spit you out. It's a game you spend a lot of hours on slowly but surely completing your missions while staying alive. It's cerebral, a slow-paced shooter that compels you to take it easy and take each step carefully. You never know whats lurking around the corner.

Such is life in The Zone...

Edit: I've been told the mod AMK 1.4 is superior to the Complete mod. Check that out.

Wedged

That was a bad jeepney ride. It was a hot day, the city was louder than usual and we were packed tighter than sardines.

My nads hurt.

I Hate February

I hate February. Out of all the months, I hate it the most. Its the month where love is in the air and all those crappy love songs on the radio and people holding hands and hugging each other, all reminding me how loveless my own life is.

Damn the radio, damn this month and damn all of you straight to hell!

Teh Secret

My mother got around to reading this book called The Secret. I asked her what the book was all about and what she said was basically this: If you want to achieve something, you must think that you are achieving it or have achieved it already. It's basically a book about positive thinking.

I am now a male supermodel genius guitar virtuoso with a six pack and a Ferrari. Hmm, I guess it didn't work.

Silliness aside, positive thinking isn't some new age babble. I believe there really is power to positive thinking. If we think positively, it can help us get the confidence necessary to move forward. Being negative practically assures failure. Negativity leads to despair and then perpetual stagnation and apathy. I must think positively. There's still half a semester to go. I can't give up yet.

I mean, getting the looks, the skill, the women, the cars and the money isn't technically a flat-out impossibility right?

A man can dream...

Squarepusher - Duotone Moonbeam

Walkout

The teacher called on three people to recite. Unfortunately, the three didn't read the case. Three consecutive calls on people who hadn't read drove our teacher to walk out. Luckily, it wasn't me who was called but still...

If it was me who was called, could I have given a satisfactory answer? Maybe. I read the case but I can only recall the "one thing" and nothing else. The "one thing" is what the case is all about or a specific feature in the case which is a "twist" to the lesson currently being discussed.. It might not even be the main issue. I can recall the "one thing" but I can't recall much else. I can't even remember if the case was murder or rape all I remember is the "one thing".

I dunno. Having the teacher walk out angrily is pretty demoralizing even if it wasn't your slip up. Kinda makes a person want to give up altogether.

The next meeting is gonna be a pain in the ass.

Chilly

Its Wednesday and it is cold and windy. There must be a typhoon or something. I forgot when a typhoon is a hurricane or when you call it a monsoon but enough about that. To make matters worse, the classrooms in the Law building are fully air-conditioned. Its like a meat freezer.

Actually, I have a conspiracy theory. The air-conditioning units are intentionally kept on full blast by the department to keep the rooms cold. Why? So us students would feel the need to buy their official Law school jackets! Its a money-making scheme I tell you, just what I'd expect from this school.

Maybe I can make a small fire under the desk for warmth...

Royal Rumble 2011

The Royal Rumble is one of the biggest PPVs in the wrestling calendar scheduled just before Wrestlemania. The main feature of the event is the titular Royal Rumble where thirty men battle it out in one ring. The contestants enter the ring one at a time and can only be eliminated by being thrown over the top rope with both feet touching the ground below. This year is the "biggest rumble evah" with forty men instead of the traditional thirty. Personally, I don't see what good adding ten more jobbers to the list is gonna do but I digress.

Anyway, I missed the first match between Heavyweight Champion Edge and Dolph Ziggler. All I know is that Edge won. That's good enough for me. I still don't think Ziggler deserves to be champ. He's got great skills but no personality. Vicky is doing all the work gathering heat for the guy. Come to think of it, there really is no reason to hate Dolph. He hasn't really done anything. We hate him because of Vicky and all she does is scream a lot.

The second match is The Miz versus Randy Orton. Great. Whatever. The match was OK except for the whole interference bullshit ending where the Nexus inexplicably show up to screw Orton over for no reason. Come on, can't Orton ever lose cleanly? Stop turning him into Cena. The match did make me realize something. I really, really fucking hate The Miz, his annoying butt buddy Alex Riley and announcer Cole. I hope they die in a fire.

The Diva Championship match sucked big time. The crowd was dead and so was I. I almost fell asleep. That's all I gotta say. Dear WWE, please fix the Diva division.

So that's it? No more championship matches? Oh, time to start the rumble then. Yay.

The Rumble is initially interrupted by the Nexus fighting against Smackdown's own gang of idiots, The Corre. Seriously, that's what the group is called. The extra R is for retarded. P.S. their t-shirt sucks too. Anyway, management has order restored and we begin with CM Punk versus US Champion Daniel Bryan. I'm just gonna go over the Rumble real quick since I can't recap every single thing. Here's some highlights: (Numbered according to appearance)

A chant battle happens for both Punk and Bryan but Punk has the bigger crowd reaction. Daniel Bryan is a talented wrestler. Seriously, he should be a contender for the Heavyweight Championship. #5 is William Regal. Damn, he really let himself go.

John Morrison appears at #7. Morrison pulls off his own awesome Royal Rumble moment. Get this, he's pushed out of the ring but grabs onto the audience barricade and clings to it like Spiderman. His feet almost touched the floor. He then balances along the barricade, jumps on the steel steps and goes back in the ring. Sweet.

At #9, Husky Harris appears as the second member of Nexus and proceeds to protect Punk with his enormously fat ass. At #10 Chavo Guerrero slides into the ring. He begins doing the late Eddy Guerrero's "Three Amigos" suplexes. He points at the sky and briefly mimics Eddy's dance. Nice tribute.

Fast forward to # 15 and its David Otunga. There are four Nexus members in the ring now. They threw everyone else out. #16 Tyler Reks comes out and stupidly charges into the ring where four large men wearing the same team colors are visibly waiting for him. God, that was stupid. Michael McGillicutty (#13) or Magilla Gorilla as I prefer to call him, throws Reks out. #17 Kozlov stupidly charges in too and so does #18 R-Truth only to be thrown out. Couldn't they have taken their time a little? #19 The Great Khali appears and manages to throw Husky "Fatty Fat Fat" Harris over but the rest prove too much and Khali goes over the ropes. Look, I know the WWE wants us to see The Nexus as a "force to be reckoned with" but this is getting boring.

Then at #21 something amazing happens. BOOKER T.The crowd goes absolutely apeshit and so do I. Booker hits the scissor kick, then another and then does the "Book End". Wait? Could it be? OH YES! Spin-a-roony! Oh man, this is good...REAL good. This is so good, I know that it won't last if the WWE has anything to do with it. Oh well, Booker T gets tossed off the ring and the disappointment in the crowd was so incredible, I thought they would riot. I wished they did.

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, John Cena comes out at #22. He gets into the ring and somehow manages to eliminate everyone but Punk. They fight a bit and knock each other out. Brilliant. #23 rings up and its Hornswoggle the "leprechaun". Really? A midget is in the Royal Rumble? This is now the lowest point in the evening.

Punk beats up Cena and turns his attention to Hornswoggle who he knocks down. He gets incredible heat from the crowd. Hilarious. CM Punk is eliminated. Lame. Eventually, some guy named Tyson Kidd comes out at #24 and I don't think neither I nor the crowd have ever even heard of him. He is so screwed. Cena effortlessly beats him and Hornswoggle pulls off an Attitude Adjustment on Kidd. You read that right. A midget just did a Fireman's Carry Slam on a guy about three times taller than him. How humiliating is that? Cena puts him out of his misery and throws him over. Alas, poor jobber, I hardly knew him. Jobber #25 appears and Cena and the midget do some funny stuff. This is the comedy segment of the Rumble it seems.

Kingston and Swagger come out at #26, #27 respectively and they all fight a bit. At #28 Sheamus (Hell Yeah!) makes his way to the ring. Looks like some faces are gonna be kicked. An interesting bit occurs when Sheamus (who is 100% concentrated Irish) comes face to face with Hornswoggle. Obviously offended by this negative stereotype of Irish culture, Sheamus deals with this affront to his proud heritage by KICKING the midget IN THE FACE. (Edit: My bad, he doesn't kick him but slams his head on the ground VIOLENTLY) I laughed so hard, I couldn't breath. Seriously, I nearly passed out. Hornswoggle goes up on the top rope to try to do a splash but Sheamus KICKS him IN THE FACE. I pissed myself. Hornswoggle is eliminated.

Some guys come out. It's not important. At #31 Ziggler appears? Didn't he just lose his Championship match? Anyway Diesel comes out at #32. The crowd goes crazy for him. They even booed Mysterio for hitting the 619 on the guy. Woah, its weird when people boo Mysterio. Has that ever happened before? Drew McIntyre appears at #33. Drew and Sheamus are both openly Irish and they hit it off pretty awesomely. Drew and Sheamus begin unloading a can of whoop ass on everyone like a...tag team? Holy shit! I hope they team up and revive the Tag Team Division.

#37 Santino shows up. He begins by strategically attacking the largest and most threatening man in the Rumble. He has his face smashed and he rolls off the ring but not over the top rope. I see what you did there WWE...

Alberto Del Rio enters at #38. Even though it's the goddamn Royal Rumble, he enters riding his sweet car and introduced by his personal announcer. You gotta love this guy. He takes his sweet time walking to the ring only to be ambushed by #39 who is...Randy Orton? Didn't he lose his Championship match as well? What the hell?

#40 is Kane. Well that sucks. No more surprises. No Triple H, no Batista, no Jericho. Shit, no Christian? Lame. Anyway stuff happens and Del Rio eliminates Orton. Looks like it's Del Rio for Wrestlemania!

But wait! Santino wasn't officially eliminated! Santino hits the cobra on Del Rio and begins dancing around the ring. I laugh my ass off. It literally fell off. I swear! Santino tries to toss Del Rio off the ropes but it backfires and Santino is done. Its Alberto Del Rio folks and I'm cool with that. If there ever was new talent to push it would be him.

It was an OK Royal Rumble.